MJ
When my 20-year-old son Jake died by suicide in February 2008, my heart was broken. Jake was artistic, athletic, an animal lover, an ardent fan of the San Francisco Giants – and those are just things starting with the letter “A!” He loved his friends and had many. But most of all, he loved his family.

I was in a very dark place after losing Jake. One of his close friends organized a fundraiser in his name and contacted AFSP to have someone talk at the event. That was our first interaction with this amazing organization. A few months later, we participated in our first Community Walk.

AMY
That was the San Francisco Community Walk, in the Fall of 2008. Jake was my little brother, and MJ is my stepmom.

Our family was having a tough time processing the fact that Jake was gone. I was a new mother, and I couldn't imagine what MJ was going through, losing her youngest child.

At that first Walk, it felt like we'd found this huge community that could help us in some way. But we had NO idea how much AFSP would end up impacting our lives for the better. After that, we started participating as a family and large group of friends in the San Francisco Community Walk each fall.

MJ
The Community Walks became an opportunity not just to receive support, but to help others. In 2014 I ran into an old teacher I hadn’t seen since before Jake’s death. She shared that her nephew had died by suicide many years earlier, and that her sister and family had never come to grips with that reality. I encouraged her and her family to join us at the Walk. At the beginning of the Walk, the family told me of their reluctance, and that they would likely only walk a short distance. I walked with them, sharing my journey and listening as they slowly opened up about their own. They walked the entire Walk with me! The following year happened to be the 20th anniversary of their loss, and they formed their own team with more than 20 walkers! It was a truly healing experience for all of us.

AMY
Our first Overnight Walk was in 2015, in Dallas. We had heard about The Overnight for years. People drive or fly in from all over the country to attend. But we felt like we just couldn't do it: walking 16+ miles overnight seemed intimidating. But we couldn't have been more wrong! It changed our lives for the better, and we look forward to it every year.

MJ
We were nervous but excited about attending that first Overnight. We wore San Francisco Giants clothing in acknowledgment of Jake’s favorite team. We met lots of fantastic people: some new to their loss, some who had lost a loved one many years previously, and those who have struggled with their own darkness. We all shared common emotions of sadness, but also of love, sharing and hope.

As we finished the Walk, we arrived at the lighted luminaria bags, which Walkers decorate with photos and expressions of the person they’ve lost. This is one of the highlights for me: a symbol of our loved ones lighting the way for us. Even after walking 16+ miles, we were energized and smiling. Walking both figuratively and literally “Out of the Darkness” was truly an amazing feeling!

AMY
My family and I moved to Bend, Oregon in 2016, but my dad and MJ were still living near San Francisco. They participated in that year's San Francisco Community Walk and accepted an award on behalf of Team Jake Millertime, in recognition of their involvement and the funds they’d raised over the years. That fall, we kicked off our new Community Walk in Bend, Oregon.

MJ
The Overnight became an annual tradition for us to see each other. Amy and I attended the Overnight in San Francisco in 2016, San Diego in 2017, then back to Dallas in 2018, Boston in 2019 and (after a break due to Covid) New York City in 2022.

AMY
My experience with the Overnight deepens every year. I get so much from the Overnight community, which has become like family to us. We’ve received so much generosity and genuine love and friendship. We try to give back as much as we get. I am profoundly more educated on mental health than when we started, and I will talk about it anywhere at any time with anyone. I want people to feel as comfortable talking about their mental health as they would a broken bone or a cold.

I was proud to be acknowledged as a North Star, in recognition of individuals who have raised at least $10k, for Boston in 2019, and then alongside MJ for New York City in 2022. Those funds make so much important work possible.

MJ
AFSP and the Walks wrap us in a blanket of love and support. Each year we return to our AFSP Overnight “family” of Walkers, staff, and beloved friends. And each year, that group grows as we meet new people. AFSP has been and remains a beautiful blessing in my life. Amy’s father and I now live in Oregon, about 20 miles away from Amy, in Sisters. So now we attend the Community Walk in Bend, Oregon together! Everything comes full circle.

Jake’s life, essence, spirit and light continue to shine through me. We can see positive movement ahead in terms of our culture’s understanding of mental health and suicide. I know Jake is clapping and cheering all of us on in our efforts to bring light and hope to those who struggle, and the people who love them.